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Question:
My best friends are legally married but not in the Church. Why can’t I have them as my baby’s Godparents? I trust them more than anyone.
Answer:
First of all, you are making a great decision to have your child Baptized! To answer your question, though, we have to understand what a Godparent is. A Godparent is not just some honorary position that you give to a good friend. A Godparent is not merely the person that you trust the most.
A Godparent is someone who can help you to raise your child to know God and to know the Church. A Godparent is someone who can show your child how to live a Catholic life by the way they live their life as a Catholic. Godparents should be a living example of the love of Christ in the world.
Because this is what a Godparent is, there are certain minimum qualifications that a Godparent must meet. As one of these qualifications is put in Canon Law, a Godparent must be one “who leads a life of faith in keeping with the function to be taken on” (Canon 874, §1, 3°). At least outwardly living a life in accordance with the faith is a minimum requirement for a Godparent, and, hopefully, you would want someone who is not just living it outwardly but is living a life of faith that will help your child get to heaven. In fact, this is the responsibility that Godparents specifically take on during the Baptism ceremony. They are asked, “Are you ready to help the parents of this child in their duty as Christian parents?,” and this duty is to train him in the practice of the faith and to keep God’s commandments.
Unfortunately, in the case described in the question, this minimum requirement is not being met. Catholics need to get married in the Church because marriage for a Catholic is not just a legal relationship; it is a sacrament and is to be received within the context of the Church. If your friends are truly committed to one another and would like to serve as Godparents in the future, encourage them to get their marriage convalidated. But don’t wait to have your child Baptized until that happens. Let us all, parents, children, and prospective Godparents grow closer to God by living the Faith. May God bless you, your child, and your friends.